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Other Names Considered for American Pharoah

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Much has been made of the spelling of the name American Pharoah. The new Triple Crown winner boasts a moniker that opts for P-H-A-R-O-A-H rather than the more accurate P-H-A-R-A-O-H. Here at the Jimbo List, we are taking an open-minded view of the matter – especially since the name could have been much, much worse.

AMERICAN PASSTIME

FEBUARY PHAROAH

TEMPERMENTAL PHAROAH

WORLD B. FREE PHAROAH

AMERICAN AMATURE

AMERICAN BELLWEATHER

SOPHMORE PHAROAH

AMERICAN PRIVALEGE

GREATFUL PHAROAH

PHAROAH MOMENTO

INDEPENDANT PHAROAH

AMERICAN DUMBELL

A dictionary and the Daily Racing Form make a nice combo.

Son of Sharknado

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Not sick of “Sharknado” yet? Good, because SyFy announced it will be repeating the hilariously lowbrow movie again next Thursday. In the meantime, here are some suggestions for new material:

ARACHNALANCHE

THUNDERATS

WORMQUAKE

PIRANHACANE

TICKTWISTER

GATORWAVE

PYTHONAMI

ALPACALYPSE

God, that felt good.

10 Terrific Tigers

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I’m hearing some great things about the special effects tiger in the film version of “Life of Pi.” This has me intrigued. Tigers just may be the most beautiful creatures on the planet, and if this pixelated critter is as wondrous as advertised, he’ll join an illustrious roster of pop culture tigers.

SHERE KHAN

I’m going with my favorite tiger first. Yes, he’s the villain from “Jungle Book,” but he’s undeniably great. He’s droll, he’s cunning, he’s merciless. He also has the voice, heavy-lidded eyes and lantern jaw of the urbane British actor, George Sanders.

TONY THE TIGER

On the other end of the spectrum, you have Frosted Flakes icon Tony the Tiger. He’s no villain – he’s more like that gregarious uncle who let you stay up past your bedtime and showed you wrestling moves like the Backbreaker and the Spinning Toe Hold. He’s not PC, but he’s ggggrrreat!

DETROIT TIGERS

Can’t say this is one of my favorite teams, since I’m a National League guy. But still, props to a Major League franchise that’s been around since 1894, boasts four World Series titles and has had players such as Ty Cobb, Hank Greenberg and Al Kaline in the lineup. Best of all, the Tigers stayed in one city all these years.

TIGGER

Dear lord, what a great creation Tigger is! Anyone with little kids (or grandkids) knows that Tigger is a welcome infusion of energy, action and humor in all situations. He’s dangerous and tame, simultaneously. Thank you, A.A. Milne and Paul Winchell.

CROUCHING TIGER, HIDDEN DRAGON

Ang Lee’s 2000 film classic is the cinematic equivalent to a tiger: it’s powerful, graceful, violent and visually arresting. You want tragic heroes and villains? You want epic history and scope? You want some kick-ass swordplay and wire walking? Your search is over. Also, it’s only fitting to include Mr. Lee in a List inspired by “Life of Pi.”

DIEGO

Dennis Leary is the voice of Diego the prehistoric tiger in the “Ice Age” movies. Although he curbs his normally robust language as Diego, Leary does a nice job of lending a soulful quality to the proceedings.

DANIEL STRIPED TIGER

Of course, there is no pop culture tiger with more soul than Daniel Striped Tiger from “Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood.” This little gent had the voice of Fred Rogers, which explained why he was so darned nice. Another thing in his favor? Sporty wristwatch.

TIGER WOODS

No, he is not a model citizen. He’s a tremendous golfer, though. For years, he absolutely commanded the attention of his competitors and sports fans in general. Very tiger-like.

HOBBES

This guy – how could you not like him? Half of cartoonist Bill Watterson’s brilliant comic strip, “Calvin and Hobbes,” tiger Hobbes is the savagely sophisticated counterpoint to incorrigible little boy Calvin. Young Calvin believes Hobbes is an actual tiger and not a stuffed animal. I’m inclined to agree.

EYE OF THE TIGER

There are several tiger songs I could have chosen, such as “Hold That Tiger” and “I’ve Got a Tiger By the Tail,” but instead I have selected Survivor’s “Eye of the Tiger” from 1982. Why? Because it’s in “Rocky III,” fool.

And now I’m off to see “Life of Pi.”

Prize Pooches: Breeds Westminster Needs

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The famed Westminster Kennel Club has added six new breeds to its competition this year, which is right around the corner.  That’s a good start, but they haven’t gone nearly far enough. Here are some breeds that would spice things up immeasurably.

JERSEY HORNDOGS

FIST-POUND PUPPIES

LI’L BOW WOWS

BRAZILIAN HAIRLESS

NEW ENGLAND SHEEPISHDOGS

HUCKLEBERRY HOUNDS

AFGHAN WHIGS

CONNECTICUT WINTRY MIXES

PUG UGLIES

BEARDED BELGIANS

UNSOBERMEN PINSCHERS

WORCESTERSHIRE POINTERS

BLUE SHARPIES

HUMONGOUS SCHNAUZERS

HAVANESE HOTDOGS

Now, those are some cool canines. Feel free to add to the List!

Jeopardy! Categories For Pets

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If you’re anything like the staff at The Jimbo List, you’ve devoted a good deal of time to wondering about “Jeopardy!” categories for house pets. What?! You haven’t pondered this even once? Here are some ideas to get you started, then.

POTENT PET-ABLES

FAMOUS TWEETS

THINGS THE CAT DRAGGED IN

WOULD A DOG EAT IT?

BUNNIES IN THE BIBLE

PRESIDENTIAL POOCHES

STATE BIRDS

BEETHOVEN

GARFIELD OR MARMADUKE?

LITTERATURE

GUINEA PIGPOURRI

FISH TANKS IN CLASSIC FILMS

Remember, all answers must be in the form of a question. Add to the List!